i've come a long way...

and still have a long way to go...i haven't posted in a while because i was having such a hard time finding happiness along the way. it just wasn't obvious to me. it still isn't but i wanted to do a quick check in. i don't think that happiness is a constant feeling. i think it can be quite fleeting. it's just being able to stand in that sunshine while it lasts and if you can make choices to prolong it that you make the right choice. easier said than done!

i went out to fire island last week. mugi and i took a cab to the train, transferred to another train and to a bus to the ferry and then walked to the little house. we spent our first night alone out there. it was really peaceful and magical. it was overall fantastic. the next morning we awakened super early and took the bike for a ride. you can't go very far...but it was just far enough.

k came out the following day and stayed until sunday. d and a came out as well. it allowed me to cook, cook and cook some more. it seems that bacon was my secret ingredient in each dish i made. i couldn't help myself. it was so darn good. i stretched a fresh tomato sauce for over three meals, added beets to multiple salads, perfected my eggs over easy (in bacon fat, of course), and just played with different flavors. i came away with a few winning recipes.

here is one for a salad that will keep you full and coming back for more:

baby arugula
fresh sheep feta
shaved beets
sauteed shallots & garlic
fresh bacon bits (just cut up a few strips of bacon into 1/4 inch strips and saute until crispy)
lemon mustard vinargrette (grainy mustard, half a lemon or a whole lemon juiced, a splash of olive oil, salt and pepper to taste and whisk!)
egg over easy right on top

i love a warm salad and this one hit the spot. it takes about 5 minutes to make and the bacon is so minimal but adds just the right amount of crunch and salt. it was a good fresh cruton substitute.

now i am back at work for a little over two weeks and then back out to fire island. my parents and m & j will be there for a few days. should be fun. i am also just looking forward to a little me time. social situations are far from my mind right now.

i have been going through a little bit of a introverted patch. just wanting to sit at home or take a walk or run or ride by myself. it's unusual for me to need so much alone time...i usually need a lot but not this much. i guess right now alone time is bringing me peace...maybe not happiness, but peace feels pretty good too. i think i am just contemplative and trying to work a bunch out...i should probably do so on a full stomach! bring on the bacon!